Thursday, 21 July 2016

13 Years In The Making ...

“We have chosen millions to represent us. And through trial and error the chosen have done their duties. But as creators of time and space and everything in between we always looked and longed for an individual who would, with free will become the man we wanted him to be. And through ions and ions we waited but none could show us the true mantle of the lone wolf. But then, a miracle happened. And then through that miracle we finally found our soldier. Our warrior who with free will would do the ultimate sacrifice and in that process become the legend who we always knew he would become.”

-The Book Of Prophecies. 

Prick. Jerk. Selfish. Asshole. These are the few words that would describe me if you met me 13 years ago here in Los Angeles. I had come here for my 4-weeks intensive acting workshop at the new york film academy back then and at that point of time the only thing I did was think about myself and what made me happy. I didn’t care what my parents thought or how much pain I caused them or to my family. Trust me, you would had hated me back then as well. And as the years passed and the more life started to unfold in front of me, the guilt of being that prick engulfed me like a storm!  I couldn’t accept the fact that I had become a mean self-centred arrogant asshole and the only way I could ever get my redemption was to come back here and make things right. Well, as they say, “The Universe will unfold all it’s wonders to you when you are ready.” And now, 13 years later I am finally here at La La Land and I can proudly say that I am now on the road to my redemption.

"Success is no accident. It is hard work, perseverance, learning, studying, sacrifice and most of all, love of what you are doing or learning to do."

Like the billions around the world, I am also amazed by America. I am attracted towards her culture, her movies and her way of life. And for many years now I had dreamed to come back here. Even my siblings wished and longed for it. But because of busy schedules and prior commitments, coming here was always delayed. But 2016 was finally the year when we were meant to come back to Los Angeles. Right now I am here with my dad and bro and in August my sister, my mom and my brother will be joining us as well. Back in 2003, I was turning 19 so the rest of siblings were way younger to me which meant that we used to go only to the movies and to theme parks. Now, in the age of apps and maps, we have become grown ups and we four rather help our cute old-school parents to find places to go and see and visit and to dine. Before I go any further I must say that we are here only because of our parents. Mom has always been the rock and the silent guardian of the family who has kept us together and dad through his sacrifice and hard work is the reason we are here. I am truly blessed to have them as parents and also truly blessed to have such lovely siblings. Speaking of siblings, my younger brother Rimoh still feels surreal to be here! He sometimes comes up to me and says, “Bhai I can’t imagine I am here in La!”. And seeing his face filled with joy truly warms my heart. Touch wood he is having the time of his life! From grading 10 on 10 on his Screen Writing course at the NYFA, to going out and living the life true La style! He is destined to live and make it big here and I know that one day very soon, that dream of his will come true. And I can’t wait for the other two to arrive. I know it will be fun when I will see my sister go for the same 4 weeks intensive acting workshop which I did and to have my youngest bro Nama with me to watch all the latest films. All great things are truly worth the wait.

"You have to fight to reach your dream. You have to sacrifice and work hard for it."
-Lionel Messi

But this blog isn’t about all the fun we will have here as a family. This blog is about the opportunity that has given to me to find my redemption. A redemption 13 years in the making. Before coming here I had it all figured out. I had told myself that I will go to La and be like a normal person. I told myself that I will make new friends, meet new people and also go out to clubs and famous restaurants. But now I realise those plans were of a Mimoh long dead. I am not that guy anymore. That Mimoh died a very long time ago. Only remnants are left, which try to surface from time to time. But in the battle between the man who depended on others for his emotions and the lone wolf that I have become now, the lone wolf is winning and whopping that old mimoh’s ass! And I love being the lone wolf. As I said before many a times, “You get used to anything if you stay around it for a while.” So now, I am way more happier and comfortable being alone than being surrounded by people. Al though I am a devotee of The Punisher there is this one line from The Dark Knight Rises I want to share with you and no, it isn’t of Bane but of Catwoman and she says, “What can I say, I am adaptable.” And I see myself as an adaptable creature as well. The moment I settle in to the place that I am staying, I make it my home and start functioning myself around my given environment. Whether it is the roads or the food or even the places where I will be training, I figure everything out as soon as I can and then I make a plan of action and go about it. And now, it has been 2 weeks since I have come here and I can tell you I am very happy about how my schedule is like. I know I should be enjoying and chilling with these two months that I am here but what can I say, Training is what I do best and “The Wicked Never Rest.” 

"Follow your passion, be prepared to work hard and sacrifice, and, above all, don't let anyone limit your dreams."
-Donovan Bailey

I am right now in los angeles! I said that again ‘cause I want that to sink in. I mean this is La La Land! The land of Hollywood and the galore and the music and streets filled with tourist and movie bill boards everywhere with amazing amusement parks and men who look like greek gods and women who aren't less than angels! And I really mean that. the very 1st morning here I had gone to ihop for their lovely black coffee and the waiter who came to give me the coffee was truly drop dead gorgeous! If my guess was right, I bet he was also a model or an inspiring actor. And the women … well … wow! I mean every other girl here is stunning! Whether it is the crossfit trainers or the outstanding dancers at IDA, I must say, Los Angeles is truly the City Of Angels! You see people from all across america trying their luck in the movies and sometimes you even get to see people from different countries who have settled here. It is truly a sight to behold and I shit you not, I do go “Wow!” every other day over here. So ya, I must be kidding myself to be the lone wolf right now, won’t I? But you see, that is what it is. No matter how beautiful these people are and no matter how tempting it is to step into those “Normal” shoes, I can never be that guy. And the truth is, I was never meant to be.

"To give anything less than your best, is to sacrifice the gift."
-Steve Prefontaine

People don’t understand. The truth is that they have tried but in the end, they don’t really get it. I have been called many names and I have been misjudged and also hated by many for the way I am. Someone once told me that I deserve to be alone. That a person like me should never have friends and should never be a part of any group. Al though back then I took it as a huge offence, today when I put the pieces together I realise that I am intact that guy! I mean how can anyone be friends with a guy who spends his entire energy towards his responsibilities? I wake up in the morning, make coffee for myself and tea for dad and rimoh. Then go for a run. Then do the laundry, then give dad his medicines then help him cook lunch, serve him luch, eat lunch and then clean the dishes. After that clear the trash, change, go for Crossfit and then my Hip-Hop Classes, come back home, heat up dinner, give it to Dad and rimoh, then eat, then clean and then go to sleep. That is my everyday schedule here  in Los Angeles and from today, I have also started my Improv 101 Class at the UCB every wednesday. I only get saturday and sunday afternoons and evenings free which I use to go and watch the latest movies in Imax. So ya, with this routine and commitments I don’t think anyone can bare with me. And I don’t even blame them. I mean, this is who I am. This is me telling the universe that I will make things right. That I will make amends with the chance given to me and through this process finally find my redemption which I was waiting for 13 years. I want to be a good son to dad. I want to be a good brother to rimoh. I don’t want mom to worry about us. I want to make sure that I am there for everyone, even beyond my own happiness and wants ‘cause deep down I know that only through this commitment and sacrifice can I finally become the man I was born to be.

"Dreams do come true, if we only wish hard enough, You can have anything in life if you will sacrifice everything else for it."
-James M. Barrie

You must have seen on The Discovery Channel that when we are about to be submerged under water we grasp in the most amount of air. And when a boxer is fighting the 12th round of the fight and has no energy he gives his one last punch with all his effort and might. That very same way those remnants of the old mimoh consume me sometimes and I suddenly feel this feeling of loneliness. I feel overwhelmed and choked up and vulnerable. I get this deep sense of longing and also a feeling of emptiness within me. I feel the need to vent out and open up and talk to someone and this voice inside of me seeks self-pity and asks, “Why doesn’t anyone ever ask me how I am?”. But if you have seen the movie Alexander, when Alexander is in stress of being King after his Father Phillip is murdered, his mother slaps his twice and screams at him and tells him, “You are King now! Start acting like one!” And just like that, from that feeling of being hollow and needy, I shake it off, take a deep breath, close my eyes and remind myself of my goals and what it is that I truly want to achieve. And what I want is Greatness and I won’t ever settle for anything less, no matter how difficult it gets. Greatness requires sacrifice and all men who become kings know that they have take that walk alone. That at the top, there shall be no one there for them. It will only be the kings and their shadows. But they also know that the climb, the sacrifice, the dedication is worth every bit of it. My dad in fact asked me today, “Have you made any new friends? Why don’t you stay back after class and try to connect with new people?” And I told him, “Dad, I am a very friendly guy, trust me, but for someone I don’t know why people don’t want to make friends with me. And truth be told, I don’t even try to give any signals. I put my headphones on, I mind my own business, greet everyone with a bright smile, give me 100% in my classes and then silently I come back home. I don’t even know how to make friends anymore.” And since the last 2 weeks I have been watching all the movies by myself and trust me I am having a gala time doing so. The old Mimoh thinks he still has a chance to take over me but I know I am way stronger now and there is no way in heaven, hell or earth that that Mimoh is ever coming back.

"You have to execute. You have to sacrifice your body. "
-Pedro Martinez

So why did I tell you all this? To have your pity? No. To make you like me? No. I told you this ‘cause this is who I am. And this will one day be my story. I shit you not, all that I imagined me doing a few years ago, is what I am doing now. Whether it is training alone at the Ufc gym or walking alone at the Hollywood Walk Of Fame or even staying home alone when dad and rimoh are out, I am doing all those things exactly how I imagined. Truly, the universe gives us what we manifest and what we believe in. No matter what people think of The Secret or the Power of the Universe, I really believe in it. And I know through my commitment, dedication, sacrifice and focus I will one day very soon earn my greatness. Today, when I hear my Improv Batchmate tell me that I am ‘Pretty Good At It’ or when I hear my Dance Teachers tell me to stand in front of the Class and to come for all their classes and hear the other students and managers tell me That I’m Good and see Trainers at Crossfit take my video while Back Squatting, I am reassured by the universe that I am on the right track. I know it isn’t easy. There will be times when you feel like quitting. When you will feel like giving in. But I promise you, if you stay the path, you will be rewarded. Whether it is the countless hours of studying for your board exams, or that one girl you wanted to ask out for prom or that one Audition which you knew would give you that big break, stay at it. Believe in yourself, believe in the power of your dreams and know in your heart that your sacrifices won’t go in vain. Hard work is always rewarded. Discipline to your cause is always appreciated. And patience is always returned with all your dreams coming true. You will stumble and fall, you will loose hope, you will also maybe loose your way. But believe and know deep down that you were meant for greatness and that no emotion, no feeling and no urge can be more powerful than the desire to succeed. So go forth your dreams and make them come true. It took me 13 years to come back here, at the same Oakwood Apartments, at the same ‘M’ building and at the same city where it all began. Now, after all these years I am on my way to greatness. And I know that I will be rewarded for my sacrifices. It’s because I believe. I just hope you believe also.

"There is no decision that we can make that doesn't come with some sort of balance or sacrifice. "
-Simon Sinek

This is Me, Mahaakshay Chakraborty. And this is My Story.

With All My Might,

Your No.1 Fan,

Mahaakshay Chakraborty.


Tuesday, 5 July 2016

The Road Ahead ...

“And so this mortal went ahead in his journey. A quest to find himself in the hidden parts of his very soul. And when he travelled across the seven oceans and the highest peaks, he realised that he wasn’t destined to be normal but to be The One. Not only because he had the will and might of the gods but because he had the power of belief.”

-The Book Of Prophecies.

In a few hours I will be on my way to the airport. I am going for two and half months to the land of the free and the home of the brave. After 13 years I will finally be going back to Los Angeles. I can’t even begin to tell you how excited I am. But beyond the excitement and the rush of going back there I feel this deep sense of responsibility. Like I have gotten a chance by the mighty universe to get even more better. In these past few months I have done courses in Comedy Improv, Salsa, Hip Hop and gotten the taste of Crossfit. I promised myself that I will emerge myself in my preparation for the great opportunity that very soon is going to come my way. But since it was decided a couple months ago that I was going to the United States I decided that all the training should be put on hold and all the energy and focus should be directed towards Los Angeles. And you know me, I find the true, spiritual meaning in everything that happens to me and lately I have started seeing the positive in every situation and trust me, even though the situation may not change, you surely feel a whole lot better when you see what you can be grateful for even in the midst of normality. Trust me readers, all that happens, happens only for the good and when you have the power of belief, anything is possible.

"Sometimes it's the journey that teaches you a lot about your destination."

Do you remember The Dark Knight Rises? Do you remember Bane’s character in it? We all know that he was a Merc for hire but do you remember when Alfred is giving Bane’s introduction to Bruce Wayne? Do you remember what does he say? He says, “Master Wayne, what I see isn’t just a man on a mission, what I see is the Power Of Belief.” Many people have asked me, “What is it that you want to do with your life?” And I simply tell them, I want to be a part of the movies now and forever. And then they ask, “Then why aren’t you doing what others are?” And I reply, I can and without your knowledge I actually do all those things but what I also do, is prepare and keep my focus and make sure that I learn and train and use all my energy on making myself better because I know that one day my time will come and when it does come I will be ready. And this answer isn’t a sense of arrogance but it is my Power Of Belief. A belief so strong that it will one day change the world. A belief with such will and might that one day I will shine as bright as the sun. A belief with such purity and focus that one day I will no longer be in the sidelines but in the spotlight.

"Focus on the journey, not the destination. Joy is found not in finishing an activity but in doing it."
-Greg Anderson

You all know that I went to Phuket last year, twice. And both those times and in fact, also at every new year’s eve I have this custom I follow. I play a few stages on either Medal Of Honour or Ghost Recon Future Soldier and I hear the song Stupify from the rock band Disturbed. Even tonight, I have followed the very same custom. It is like I am reminding myself who I truly am and what responsibilities lay in front of me and what all I need to do in the 2 1/2 months that are now in front of me. It is me showing myself that behind the iron clad skin, my soul will always be on a quest to learn and explore more. That deep down, I will always be grateful to the universe and to my parents and to my family and to my life itself for making me the man that I am today. That every thing that has happened in my life has brought me to this new exciting juncture of my life where I will only evolve. So before I leave, I will put my headphones on and Stupify will be heard by the nerves of my brain for the trillionth time and everything in the universe will look beautiful and the siren of the gods will be heard.

"We are at our very best, and we are happiest, when we are fully engaged in work we enjoy on the journey toward the goal we've established for ourselves. It gives meaning to our time off and comfort to our sleep. It makes everything else in life so wonderful, so worthwhile."
-Earl Nightingale

So what is in stored for me in the city of angels? Well, first it is the UFC 200 expo happening in las vegas which I really really wanna go for ‘cause I will get the opportunity to see and meet the amazing ufc fighters and also take pictures with them! it will truly be a dream come true for me! And it is on the 8th so I can tell the jet lag to take a hike ‘cause I will be going to vegas! And then it is the grand UFC Gyms which are located all over LA for me to choose from and be a part of. I have waited nearly 6 years to train in a UFC Gym and very soon that dream of mine will come true! Then it is the endless places and spots where comedy improv and stand-up comedy workshops are taking place for me to choose from. Since I have done till Level 2 here it would be great to see what level 3 has in stored for me over there. I also goggled Parkour and Crossfit gyms which I can join and I will also be enrolling myself at the IDA Hollywood Centre.  The International Dance Academy in Hollywood. It is one of the most renowned and popular and recognised dance centres in Los Angeles and when you see their students perform their hip-hop moves on youtube you will agree with me that it will truly be an honour to be a part of their centre. And of course when I will be done with kicking a 1,000 kicks at the UFC gym and sweating it at and learning new dance moves at IDA and trying to come up with spontaneous jokes at the comedy stand-up studio, I will be touring the Universal City Walk, watching all the latest films, and taking a gazillion pics and keep snap chatting as much as I can. So it looks like I have a very busy 2.1/2 months in front of me. And even though it took 13 years for me to go back, I can tell you right now, every moment of that wait was worth it. 

"Every day is a journey, and the journey itself is home."
-Matsuo Basho

So once again I embark on a new chapter of my life. I embark on a task to make myself better and make my parents proud and prove to myself without a shadow of a doubt that I have the will and determination to go beyond the call of duty. To be the best version of myself and to push harder when I can’t anymore. I thank you all for being my readers. I thank my family for this opportunity and I thank the universe for giving this feeling of bliss. I can’t promise if I will blog from there but if I do I will share all my bliss and joy with you as well. You see, the universe is a friendly place and I am a firm believer in the power of it. I know I am connected to it. And I know it is with me every step of the way. You can harness it’s power also. You can also find your joy and bliss. Never doubt it. Never give in to the negativity that you feel may cloud over you sometimes. Find the greater good. Seek the happiness and it will cone to you. Rumi said a very wonderful thing once. He said, “What You Seek Is Also Seeking You.” Ask yourself the question. Go on that quest and your joy will come to you. So before I go all I can say is that I have beautiful road ahead of me, which is filled with excitement and joy and learning and bliss. And everyday I will the grateful for the blessings the universe showers over me. I hope you do that also.

This is Me, Mahaakshay Chakraborty and this is My Story.

With All My Might,

Your No.1 Fan,

Mahaakshay Chakraborty.


Wednesday, 18 May 2016

Forging A Destiny Through Acts Of Randomness ...

"And so the trials and tribulations will begin for this mortal. The mortal we chose out of the many. A boy who would transform into a man through iron and steel. And we will make him the warrior that he is destined to become. But what we never thought, what we never expected or ever saw coming was that this warrior had a power of his own. He had the will to challenge his own mortality. He had the courage to look fate right in the eye and say, "I bow down to none."

-The Book Of Prophecies.

The 1st day when you enter a Boxing or Mma class, you are excited as a little boy with candy. You want to hit all the bags as hard you can and you want to show your master that you know everything already. You take up all the opponents he throws at you and eventually 'cause of your foolishness you get your ass handed to you. Then, when you are down at the mat, beaten, you realise you have a long road of training ahead of you to become the fighter that you dream to be. And then, as the days go by you become more focused and calmer and you become selective. In other words, you evolve and become better. The same thing goes with me and my blogs I guess. When I started writing these blogs, they used to be once a week almost for 2 years or so. Of course, I'm not saying that they all were bad but now, when I go back and view them, well, let's just say they weren't presented that well. But now, I know I am selective about my topics. I know that whenever I open my laptop and start writing, it has to have some deeper meaning to me. So ya, writing less doesn't affect me anymore. But writing with purpose and depth truly does.

"You can't connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something - your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. This approach has never let me down, and it has made all the difference in my life."

-Steve Jobs

Today I am at home resting and recovering from a fever which kicked in yesterday. I felt a terrible pain on the left side of my body and I thought it was just soreness from the crossfit session I did on monday. But when my kicks weren't going high enough and when my stamina was depleting faster than the air from a torn ballon, I realised that a fever was creeping up on me. The doctor told me today either it is a throat infection which is the devil or over-training. Al though I know the throat infection has done this, I am not taking any chances with pushing myself unnecessarily towards an over-training state. And yes, the rest has really helped. I can already feel the cells in my body recovering and within a day or two I will be back on track. And by back on track I mean listening to my body more and doing 'Smart' training instead of 'Balls-Out' training. And speaking of training I recommend everyone to try Crossfit! It is absolutely revolutionary! To be honest, when I was in Phuket, I was completely against the Crossfit Training 'cause I didn't know how it would help me achieve my goals. But since the last 45 days in the Crossfit Training world I can tell you it is the best thing that fitness and science has to offer today. There are of course many gyms which provide crossfit training and also like a 1,000 websites which do the same too. If you are looking for a solution to achieve your fitness goals by just being in the gym for only 60mins, well, then crossfit is for you!

"It is not in the stars to hold our destiny but in ourselves."

-William Shakespeare

Staying at home does have it's advantages as well. I get to spend more time with the pets. I get to catch up on all my favourite tv shows. I get to read all my comics through the marvel comics app. And I get to sit alone and count my blessings and see how many things there are there for me to be grateful about and look up at the Universe and say, "Thank You". I hope you do that also. You know the feeling-immense-gratitude-part. At first, it may feel all superficial and funny and weird but as your progress into this habit in finding the good in everything, you will eventually, by default do that and later on, even in your weirdest and saddest of moods, you will see the light in the darkness and automatically feel great about everything. As I had told in my last blog that I promised myself that I would never sit idle again and I am proud to say that now 'Staying Active' has become my life's mantra. And for the record, staying active doesn't mean that you have to run marathons or climb mountains or stay out throughout the day. No. Staying active means that you emerge yourself in activities which are productive for you. And those activities can literally mean anything. It can be bungee jumping 5 times in a day or writing your 1st book or just being with yourself and being content with what the universe has offered to you.

"As long as we are persistence in our pursuit of our deepest destiny, we will continue to grow. We cannot choose the day or time when we will fully bloom. It happens in its own time."

-Denis Waitley

I just finished reading my 7th book of the year. It was called 'Intensity' and yes, as the name goes, it was truly intense! It was by far one of the best thrillers I have ever read and every page kept me at the edge of my seat! I still have 5 more books to go in order for me to finish my Goodreads Reading Challenge. And my next read will be 'The Blood Defence.' It is a courtroom drama/thriller and the author is the famous lawyer who fought the O.J. Simpson case. I am very much excited to read it! Ooohhh, I love thrillers! Do any of you read? If you do, then trust me, you have a best friend right there in those books. Books teleport you to a world where you are filled with these amazing characters that you bring to life and as the stories go ahead, these characters become alive in your head and in a way become a part of you. Whenever I am engrossed in a book, I loose track of time and that is how deeply submerged I get in my book-reading world. I still can't believe that I am the same boy who took 2 months to finish Jurassic Park when I started reading it in school. I never knew that reading novels would eventually become such an important part of my life.

"It is in your moments of decision that your destiny is shaped."

-Tony Robbins

You all must know by now that I am a gadget freak and I get excited about new electronics and apps and updates and how I can connect one device to another and make the machine into a bad-ass transformer look-a-like. Well, thanks to the suggestion of Anna {his name is Ganesh} I recently installed the Office's Surround system at the flat and connected all the devices to it. And with Netflix now in India I connected my account with the apple tv and whenever I am there I am either watching Sherlock or watching funny 'epic fail' videos on youtube. And speaking of youtube, I always go into 'freeze mode' when I see 'Sniper' in the 'suggestions for you' section. Imagine blinking your eyes, drinking a glass of water and cleaning the table from the dust the air poured in and then suddenly when your eyes see the word 'Sniper' you stop doing everything and become transfixed to that word. I  automatically get transported into this fantasy realm where I am a special ops sniper sent on the most deadliest mission in order to save the world. How do I explain this to you? How do I make you feel how I feel when I see myself inserting those .50 cal bullets into the cartridge. With the rain making it's presence felt on the earth outside my base camp. With thunder and lightning proving mother nature's point that you don't screw with her. How can I show you how serene it feels to be all alone in the heart of the jungle amongst those beautiful animals the god created? How do I show you the beautiful terrains and landscapes that I crawl and walk through to get the perfect aim for the terrorist I am assigned to send straight to hell with a bullet with his name written on it? How do I begin to express my happiness when I know I went through Sniper training and I was pushed by my drill sergeants to become the most lethal warrior in the history of the world? How can I show you the tears of joy in my eyes when I finally see that scumbag through the scope of my rifle and just before I squeeze the trigger I look up at the heavens and say a prayer and thank the powers that be for making me this lone wolf who went through hell and back, who survived and embraced the horror of pain and who now is doing an act of valour by ending the life of a monster who only deserves punishment? I guess I won't ever be able to make you understand what I see and feel 'cause maybe sometimes the best experiences are felt when you feel them yourself.

"Your destiny is to fulfill those things upon which you focus most intently. So choose to keep your focus on that which is truly magnificent, beautiful, uplifting and joyful. Your life is always moving toward something."

-Ralph Marston

So why the topic such as "Forging a destiny through acts of randomness"? And why would I write whatever popped up in my head without a certain 'order'? Well, that was the idea to begin with, wasn't it? More than making a point to all of you, my readers, I wanted to make a point to myself. And this 'making point' intervention came only a few days ago when I was reading an article on Tarot Reading and Astrology and Numerology. Al though I respect the people who practice it and also the people who believe in it, I personally don't anymore. I am a man of science and what all my courses in Astronomy and Astro-Biology have taught me is that whatever is backed up by years and years of data is the hard proven fact and nothing can challenge that. And to make my belief in science and Free-Will more gratifying was when I saw the last episode of DC's Legends Of Tomorrow where it was mentioned that we all are the Masters Of Our Own Fate and nobody or no entity has the right or power over us. Even my favourite actor Jake Jyllenhal believes in the power of the universe and sees the Signs and Signals it lays in front of us. Of course, I am just a mortal who is giving his own point of view and I know I will be challenged for this but what I am trying to say is that there is a major difference in walking the path laid in front of you and letting someone else decide what path you need to walk on. A part of me does believe and is also convinced that I am meant for things that I can't even believe to imagine myself. But a part of me also believes that I can't let a prediction or a card or a number dictate my actions towards my future. Whatever I am today, whether it is good or bad or simply screwed up, I am 'cause of my own choices and actions. And I made those choices 'cause something deep within me told me to do so. And since the day I was born, I have always done the things which have brought me a certain degree of joy and happiness and a certain amount of contentment. I have trained in the heat and also embraced pain in the cold. I have bled and cried and have gone to hell and back, all with my own will. Today, there is this uncontrollable power in me. A quest to learn more. A positivity which can't be broken by any negative encounters I face. Today I have the power of belief and I am convinced 100% that my time to shine in the sun will come. And when it does I will be ready for it. So now, writing this blog and being in this moment, I have come to learn that there are only two things you should depend upon. One, is the Trust in the Mighty Universe. And Two, the belief in your own capabilities. So that is why I walk in the path laid in front of me. I don't crib about the things that I thought we were meant to be mine or which slipped through my fingers. I don't complain about the things I don't have and which others get without putting in the effort. I don't mind that I have to wait in line while others get the fast pass. I do these things today because I know there is a plan for me and not because I believe that some stone or some colour or some number is going to change my destiny or fate.

"Actions are the seed of fate deeds grow into destiny."

-Harry S Truman

So, my dear readers I urge you to believe in yourselves. Believe that you and the universe are always tuned in together and trust your own instincts and trust what the universe gives you and I promise you when you truly accept these things, you will find peace and when you find peace, you will find joy and when you will find joy, you will eventually find your purest form of being and that being which is inside of you will thank you for it. Don't care what society thinks of you. Don't care how much people will talk behind your back or will bitch about you. It is their job and they will continue to do so no matter how great you will become one day. You only have one job to do and that is to get up, dress up and show up every single day until your moment comes. We all come with our destinies and our own fates. We all come with making this world a better place to live in so become that person. Don't end up being the person people want you to be. Be the individual people follow rather than the person who follows the crowd. It takes courage to be abnormal. To be left out of the crowd and walk in the wilderness alone. But in the end it is courage that truly counts. I know I have made choices which are not liked by many. And I know many of my choices have also pushed people away. But whatever the cost is I am willing to bat on it. I am willing to do what my gut tells me too. And no matter how tough it gets I am never going to stop. And I hope neither do you.

"A person often meets his destiny on the road he took to avoid it."

-Jean de La Fontaine

This is Me, Mahaakshay Chakraborty and I Am The Master Of Fate. The question is, are you?

With All My Might,

Your No.1 Fan,

Mahaakshay Chakraborty.

Thursday, 10 March 2016

The Wicked Never Rest ...

"And so many will come and go. We will see men rise and fall. We will be there to see the end and the new beginnings. But one mortal amongst the billions of the billions will do the unthinkable. He will never stop. No matter the pain and the agony and the struggle this mortal will never stop. And thus by doing this he will eventually become one of us."

-The Book Of Prophecies.

It has been a very long time since my last blog entry. I know. I should had written before and more frequently. But the very objective of this blog entry is to tell you why I haven't been in touch with my blogging skills as of late. As you know I got back from my 2nd tour of Phuket and Tiger Muay Thai Camp in december. Once I got back I was catching up with the responsibilities and work which was waiting for me here. Then in january I decided that I would make up a list of things to do in the year 2016. Of course I can't share much about that list but the planning and organising my plan of action took the entire month of january. And then in February me and the family were in Ooty for the progress of our Hotel The Monarch and that is how february went by. But now, in the month of March I can say I am at full speed ahead with the things I wanted to achieve in 2016. Before I go into the details I want to say that I have realised and absorbed through my own actions that the more you keep yourself busy and engrossed in the productivity of yourself, there won't ever be a moment where you will feel that you are bored or that you have nothing to do. The Devil was smart when he said, "The Wicked Never Rest". I guess now I know what that means.

"All things truly wicked start from innocence."

-Ernest Hemingway

You all know that I have been practicing Mma {Mixed Martial Arts} since the end of 2010. This year end it would be 6 years for me to be associated with the sport. Al though I do confess that in the middle I did go of it for a while but when I did return to it's form of training I knew I would never stop learning and growing. And that is why I went to Phuket twice to learn a more advanced level of Mma. When I came back, I was like, "Will I be able to find the same kind of intensity here with the same discipline and techniques?" To be honest I goggled and tried my hands everywhere. While some places replied to me in weird english and some places did offer some martial arts classes, none were able to satisfy my hunger of learning hardcore Mma even though you would go to 'Martial Arts' classes but end up knowing more than the instructors. I thought I had hit a wall when I finally decided that I would travel all the way to bandra at least 2 days a week to XFF {Extreme Fight Federation}, where I had trained earlier. But to my surprise when I spoke to Shafiq Bhaijaan, the owner of Xff, he informed me that they have opened a new class here in andheri. I surely was thrilled to visit this new class but also a little spectacle of how large the place would and whether they would have the right flooring and mats and so on. But to my surprise the class was state-of-the-art and the training was more extreme than what I learnt in phuket! The Xff team has a strict no-bullshit philosophy and they make sure to kick your ass if you don't understand that on day one. Since the day I joined Xff, I make sure to train 5 days a week {Mon-Fri} and give it my best in every class. Of course after wednesday the body screams a 1,000 screams to take rest and recover but skipping even one class will make me miss a special jut-jitsu move practiced that day and when I do show up for class, I make sure to keep my mouth shut because at the end of class during our conditioning round I automatically end up screaming in pain as the instructors hit 30 hard punches in the stomach and make 10-15 shin contact kicks for us students to improve our tolerance to pain. Don't believe me? Well, come for a class and you will see what I am talking about. But now all I can say is that Mma is now not a 2-days-in-a-week activity for me but a 5 days brutal obstacle course which has become a very important part of my life. Mma everyday teaches me to be more patient and calm and humble and it shows the way to reach the zone of zen 'cause fighters always look for a fight but warriors embrace the fight and make it a part of their own soul.

"Beauty is indeed a good gift of God; but that the good may not think it a great good, God dispenses it even to the wicked."

-Saint Augustine

I remember it was in the month of july when I finally found The World Dance Centre and thought of taking a trial class to see how it was. Of course since I was the newbie that day I wasn't able to catch up to any of the steps. I remember I couldn't even do the warm-up properly! But what glued me to TWDC was the work ethic. All the instructors were hard-core professionals and they took care of all their students and made sure we gave our best in the class. Once the class was over I had decided that this would be the place where I would learn the new forms of Dance including Urban Funk, Jazz and Hip-Hop. Of course I wasn't regular in the beginning. But slowly slowly as I got the hang of it I started loving the classes more and more and the more I saw myself catching and matching up to the steps and picking up the steps at a higher rate I felt more motivated to learn and increase my rank to the advance level of the class. I must admit there are many dancers in class who are far better than me but it feels really good to be recognised by all the other students and also by the instructors as one of the boys who puts his best foot forward thrice a week. Our head coach/instructor Dev Sir gives a new choreography once every 2 weeks and I make sure I give my 100% to class even though it is only a couple of hours after my Mma class. I remember dancing alone in the Monarch Ooty Discotheque when I was a kid. Back then I never knew I would join such a great establishment and test my own limits in dance and learn some great forms and concentrate in the execution of the steps rather than just following the 1,2,3 and 4 of the beats.

"If evil is inevitable, how are the wicked accountable? Nay, why do we call men wicked at all? Evil is inevitable, but is also remediable."

-Horace Mann

The 1st thing we do when we make a fitness plan is to Run. Yup. The most basic and yet one of the most affective forms of exercise. Today, thanks to treadmills we can have the opportunity to run at home itself and cover long distances by running at the same place. But thanks to technology and the developments of Apps I came across Nike+ a unique app made only for runner and for fitness freaks who like to challenge themselves by covering vast and long distances, outdoors or indoors. I should thank my Chaddi Buddy Saideep Israni for introducing me to the app. Since the time I have downloaded it, I use it every time I go for a run. I run more on the treadmill at home and even though that may sound soothing, I make it tough  by wearing the Elevation Mask and by seeing the stats and miles covered by others on the Nike+ app. {My main focus is always Saideep as he really runs a lot!} So by activating the app and marking my progress I see what is my ranking on the Board and this in return makes me more motivated to run a lot more than when I previously use too. Almost 2-3 years ago my max limit use to be 4-5kms. But now I don't run less than 7-8kms per session. It takes me 60-65mins to complete that distance {8kms} but even though it is a tough ordeal, reaching your target kilometre is a feeling of exhilaration and joyous victory. So I run as many days as I can but whenever I do I make sure it is challenging me.

"None of us feels the true love of god till we realise how wicked we are. But you can't teach people that - they have to learn by experience."

-Dorothy L. Sayers

I have always challenged myself. And a guy like me needs a fight, needs a purpose and a goal to feel alive and that is why till today and maybe for the rest of my life I will always wander and be on a quest to find the next thing to achieve and to master. When I came across Mma all those years ago I knew then that it would be the next big challenge in my life and even though today it is one of the toughest arts to master I know I have got the hang of it and will only get better at it over time. But nothing and I mean nothing prepared me for Parkour. I was one day heading for my dance class when I noticed a Studio opened at the ground floor of my building. It stated that it has Dance Fitness, Aerobics and Parkour. At first, I didn't pay much attention to it 'cause I thought it must be one of those small rooms converted into a studio and that there won't be sufficient space to do any activity properly. But just a couple of weeks ago, I thought, "What the hell! Let's go check it out anyways. What do I have to loose?". I went in, saw the place, liked it very much and I also managed to see the Parkour class going on. The sight of seeing these young boys flipping in the air and balancing their landing with the utmost precision really intrigued me and I told the owner that I would like to come for a Private Trial Class. So this tuesday I finally went for my very 1st Parkour Class. At first, we did some full body stretching and a couple of jumps and light drills to warm the body up. And once we were done with that, the head coach Roshan {His name actually isn't Roshan but I call him that} brought out all the obstacles in which I had to perform. What happened after that? Well, let's just say I was pushed like I was never pushed before for the next 60mins. I was jumping over obstacles, learning techniques I never thought I would and jumping of barricades and taking high jumps and hanging in bars and rotating myself in the air. And after peeling of the skin in my hands and drenching with sweat like I was caught in the rains of mumbai, I was satisfied and sure that Parkour had officially become a very important of my fitness and my life. I always wanted to conquer my fear of heights and falling on my ass and now I am certain that Parkour is the way I will finally achieve that.

"O Lord, deliver me from the man of excellent intention and impure heart: for the heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked."

-T. S. Eliot

Fitness isn't the only thing that is keeping me busy. I had mentioned earlier that because of technology and apps people have found great tools and ways in which they can be motivated and also learn many new things. And one such app is the Goodreads app. It is an app for people who read books and this app helps you find the books you like to read and also share your thoughts with the goodreads community. Last year I had signed up for the goodreads reading challenge in which I had to decided how many books I will read in a year. Last year I had decided that I would read 12 books {One book per month}. Unfortunately I didn't reach my target. I had completed 9 books by the end of last year so this year I took it to myself that come what may, I will complete my reading challenge {12 books yet again} and I am happy to inform you that in the first 3 months of 2016 I have completed 5 books already! I have read 13 Hours: The Secret Soldiers Of Benghazi, Code Name Johnny Walker, The Crossing, Black Eyed Susans and Born To Fight. All of the mentioned were engrossing books in their own right and I truly enjoyed reading every page in them. I make sure to read one Fiction book and then one Non-Fiction book in that order 'cause I believe I get to steer my imagination with the Fictional Thrillers and I gain knowledge with the Ever-So-Real Non-Fictional true stories. Books now have become a very important part of my daily schedule and I take a lot of interest and thought as to which would be my next read. Speaking of my next read, I have decided that I would be reading this book titled 'Intensity'. It has a great rating on the site and readers have called it one of the most engrossing thrillers of all time! So I guess 2016 would be the year in which I finish my 1st ever goodreads challenge. And speaking of challenges there is something I really wanted to share with you. A few weeks ago, I had decided that I would write up my next blog entry just as I am doing right now and I had started doing that with the utmost zeal and concentration. I had thought about the points and the breakdowns and how the blog will look when I had finished writing it. But as I started writing it, I realised that I am not writing a blog but intact a Story! I was like, "Mimoh, this isn't a Blog anywhere and neither is this a short story you can upload. This is an attempt to actually write a novel!" And now, whenever I get time, I open up my laptop and write up a new chapter in it and go back to the old chapters to see if they need any corrections or alterations. I don't know if I will ever share the story with the world or not but what I do know is that I am going to finish writing it and by the time it is done, I would had finished writing my very 1st novel, a thought which had never occurred to me ever because before that I was just a blogger but soon I can say that I am a proud blogger and an amateur writer as well.

"To see and listen to the wicked is already the beginning of wickedness."


But wait, there is more. I have always been a fan of Astronomy {Not astrology. People always get confused when I tell them that} and the Universe and everything in it. Before joining films I wanted to go to Nasa and explore the cosmos. But now I think that why can't I do both? And that is how I came across this site called Coursera. It is an amazing site where universities from all around the world offer courses on mostly all the available subjects there exist. From Music to Social Sciences to Geography and of course Astronomy. And even though I finished my 1st Astronomy course last year, I decided that I wanted to venture more into the subject and that is why I signed up for the Astro-Biology course which is being conducted by the University of Edinburgh. I am in my 4th week now and viewing the lectures, writing the important points down and answering the quizzes makes me feel I am back in school and passing on to the next lecture is surely an exhilarating experience. I surely will sign up for more courses in the future 'cause I believe one should never stop learning. One should always learn something new and something which intrigues the human mind. But besides training, reading and studying, I have also signed up for my very 1st Comedy Improv Workshop. It is so much of fun I tell you and also a task 'cause there they teach you how to create comedy within a second's notice 'cause true comedy is always what comes automatically. Al though this is my 2nd workshop of this year {I did the Inside Out Acting workshop in january} I know this wouldn't be the first and last time that I would be doing an improv comedy workshop. I am hungry to learn more and the only way I can learn more is by finding that next new level which I need to cross and that next target which I need to Achieve.

“The virtuous man contents himself with dreaming that which the wicked man does in actual life.” 

― Sigmund FreudThe Interpretation of Dreams

By now you must be thinking is that all you do in a week? But I say there is still a lot more that I can do and I should. My day starts by 8am and now I sleep of by 12am and in between apart from the above mentioned I make sure I give the No.1 importance to my Work. I go to mostly all the auditions that are being held. I meet Casting directors, Producers and Directors and I make sure I am in the loop with all the news of the new films that are being made so I can get the opportunity to show case my talents yet again. Apart from auditions, I love relaxing by watching American Television which includes American Crime Story, Supernatural and House Of Cards to name a few. Besides television I also am a huge fan of Video Games and now I am completely engrossed in Tom Clancy's The Division which is a treat for all game lovers. I am also deciding to learn a new language and although I know what language that is, I would like to talk about it some other time. Who knows maybe I may also share some words and sentences with you in that language in my next blog. And the main reason I wrote this blog today wasn't because I wanted to share my routine with you or the things that I am doing in my life. I know by having that agenda I would achieve nothing grand and neither would you. What I wanted to share was that we humans, if decide as a single individual that we will never be bored again, that we won't waste our time in thinking about what to do and actually go ahead and do it, we would really astonish ourselves! Now, I astonish myself everyday. And because I am so engrossed in my own activities throughout the day I have tagged myself as the Lone Wolf. If you go to my Snapchat {search mahaakshay} you will see all my posts with the #LoneWolf because now I do everything on my own. I watch movies in the theatre all by myself {a thing which I really love}, I see youtube videos of Parkour and Hip Hop, Comedy Improvs and Interviews of Legendary Actors. I make my own Breakfast and clean my own clothes. I truly live the life of a Lone Wolf, something which I am really proud of and something that I always wanted to do but never did until now. So I guess the Devil was right when he stated the fact that 'The Wicked Never Rest'. I don't know how wicked I am but what I do know is that I will make sure I will never sit idle again. And I will never stop learning and growing and becoming a better human being. I care two hoots about what people think about me but I do care a lot in becoming the best version of myself whenever I brush my teeth and cut myself while shaving. And that is why I will always be on a quest to find the next challenge and the next obstacle and the next battle to win. I hope you all who are reading this also find new challenges and ordeals to overcome and I wish you the very best in your chosen field of endeavour 'cause nothing and I mean nothing is more satisfying that reaching your goals and the feeling of victory of the human soul.

“One must be cunning and wicked in this world.” 

― Leo TolstoyWar and Peace

This is Me, Mahaakshay Chakraborty and this is My Story.

With All My Might,

Your No.1 Fan,

Mahaakshay Chakraborty.