“And so this mortal walked on. Walked alone in the path in front of him. But we, The Gods, were still not convinced of this mortal’s conviction and devotion so we sent the Reaper to him. The Reaper had only one objective, to test the soul of this mortal. To lure him into temptation and distract him and to make him weak. But after a while when the Reaper came back to us and told us what happened, we knew we made the right choice to make this mortal our Lone Wolf.”
-The Book Of Prophecies.
For all those out there who think that Mahaakshay is writing this blog, let me stop you right there and inform you that Mahaakshay is right now engrossed in his training in Phuket. And since he is busy training his ass off I am taking the advantage of the free time I have before I go and tell you all about what I witnessed when I was with him. In case you don’t know who this is, I am Michael. I am the Reaper sent from the underworld to consume Mahaakshay’s soul but when Mahaakshay met me, he befriended me and started to call me Michael so I guess the name got stuck. I have written a few blogs over the course of many years that I have been with Mahaakshay. Since day one he knew what my intentions were and not even once did he flinch or was intimidated by me or my presence. He knew I was under direct orders from the lords of the underworld to make sure that his soul gets weakened and that he finally gives into normalcy and temptation. But what I saw was something to dark and cold to experience even for a soul observer like me. And even though I’m not that much of a talker I think this story has to be told.
"If you don't like the hand that fate's dealt you, fight for a new one."
They say every human being comes with a destiny. Well, I came into Mahaakshay’s life the moment he was born. The lords downstairs and some say even up there in heaven knew that he was the Mortal who the Book Of Prophecies had mentioned about. And since the Lords aren’t allowed to intervene with the humans they sent me to make sure that Mahaakshay never reaches his potential. I was assigned to make sure that he always be distracted and never once feel that he was destined to be special. For many years I was succeeding in my plan. Mahaakshay faced many trials and tribulations but not once did he flinch from his normalcy. I threw one temptation after the other at him and he gave in to all of it. The lords were quite happy with my work and they told me that I should continue this until Mahaakshay’s grows old, withers and dies. I was like, “Ok. This task was more easier than I had thought.” But then on that fateful day everything changed … forever.
"I can control my destiny, but not my fate. Destiny means there are opportunities to turn right or left, but fate is a one-way street. I believe we all have the choice as to whether we fulfil our destiny, but our fate is sealed."
I remember that day like it was yesterday. It was May 12th 2005. It was the 1st day when Mahaakshay saw the Promo for The Punisher film and the way his eyes were glued to that Skull I knew that something in him had changed forever. It was like a Seed was planted in him or a part of his soul which came to life that day. After that, he wasn’t the same man again. He became obsessed with Frank Castle! Everything in life revolved around The Punisher. Whether it was the Books, the Games or the Movies, Mahaakshay ate, slept and thought only about The Punisher. But even though he was distracted from the normal routines of life I wasn’t going to go down without a fight. So I made sure I did everything to keep him ‘normal’ and ‘mellow’. But with each passing day my powers were not affecting him and the Lords were sensing that too. So me and the lords came up with a new strategy. We thought lets fight with fire and so we initiated operation ‘Battle Soul’. Operation Battle Soul would make Mahaakshay’s life filled with Battle and conflicts and challenges to such extremes that he would finally give up and finally give in to us again. But what did we know that this Mortal wasn’t normal to begin with. He was destined to be Battle Forged and Battle Forged he became.
"Just because Fate doesn't deal you the right cards, it doesn't mean you should give up. It just means you have to play the cards you get to their maximum potential."
To this day I regret the day I brought Mma into Mahaakshay’s life! I thought that by getting hit in the head for a few times and having more than 3-4 shoulder dislocations Mahaakshay would realise that fighting isn’t meant for him and he would hang his gloves. But the exact opposite happened! The more he punched and kicked he felt alive and he eventually fell in love with the rush what fighting gives to a man. Since that day in 2010 November, he has not even once thought of stopping to learn and excel in the field of Mixed Martial Arts. And the more his body got stronger so did his spirit. Before he was dependant on others for approval and support but as the years passed he became more and more self-involved and less devoted to the care and feelings of others. The more he dwelled into the darkest parts of his soul the more he became the Mortal the Book Of Prophecies had proclaimed him to be. And even though I was there with him every step of the way, even though I was the only one Mahaakshay ever confided into I knew that I had lost Mahaakshay forever. And at that point I didn’t care what kind of Punishment the Lords would sentence me with. At that point I only knew that even though I was the Grim Reaper the taker of souls, I would never want to be like Mahaakshay Chakraborty.
"Our fate is determined by how far we are prepared to push ourselves to stay alive - the decisions we make to survive. We must do whatever it takes to endure and make it through alive."
I mean who goes back to camp just after coming back? Who goes back into the fight when he has family and friends and loved ones waiting for him back home? Who gets so consumed by Fight, Battle and War that he can’t enough of it? In my line of work I have taken souls of billions and billions of souls. I have seen darkness and goodness in all of them. But what I see in Mahaakshay scares even me! His soul you see, it is consumed by a purity even I have’t seen yet! And now I know why the Lords are so scared of him! He is human but behaves like a machine. He doesn’t flinch. He doesn’t wander. He doesn’t stop! i have seen the way people look at him! I have seen the hate he has received from the world for the way he is! But nothing seems to affect him! He gets up, washes his face and gets back right into the fight! i mean, have you ever heard a guy go up to his trainer and tell him, “Master I want you to hit me as hard as you can. I want to feel the pain in my body and I want to have cuts and bruises all over my body tomorrow morning! So hit me and let me get stronger!” Those words no normal man can ever say but now I have come to realise that Mahaakshay was never normal to begin with. No matter what I tried to do to distract him. Whether it was lust or care or kindness or even love noting could stop Mahaakshay from being the man he was destined to be. And now I don’t see a man, I see a Soul on Fire. A Soul ignited by Battle. And a Man that will never stop.
"My fate cannot be mastered; it can only be collaborated with and thereby, to some extent, directed. Nor am I the captain of my soul; I am only its noisiest passenger."
But before I planned to depart to the underworld again, I finally took the courage and had a one on one with Mahaakshay. I wanted to once and for all truly understand this mortal who had become the best friend that I ever had. The following is the dialogue exchanged between me and Mahaakshay.
Me: Why do you do it brother? Why fight so hard? Why only fight? Why never stop?
Maha: Brother, you of all people should know by now that I am nothing without my fight. Fighting is what i do best. Whether I am fighting for my right to be here or whether I am fighting to be noticed, Fighting is what keeps me alive and makes me push myself harder.
Me: But brother, there is life even beyond fighting. Don’t you agree?
Maha: I tried that life brother. i tried to be ‘Normal’. I tried to have friends and I also tried to fall in love, to be in love and stay in love but you know how all those stories turned out to be. All left.
Me: They didn’t leave you bro. I was there. it was you who pushed them away.
Maha: Yes I did. And I did that because I know who I am. I am the lone wolf. And lone wolves can never keep others happy.
Me: Why don’t you try again brother?
Maha: Too late for me now. I am too far down that rabbit hole. And now there is no going back for me. Frank Castle never wanted me to become this way I know. Mma never wanted me to turn into this machine. I know. This was all me. I am the reason I have become this aloof, self-centred, selfish of a human being. I am the reason I am alone today and always will be.
Me: But brother, I have seen you smile. I have seen you breaking bread with wonderful people. I have seen you care and I have seen you having hope towards the light of things. It isn’t too late for you. You can still turn this darkness into light.
Maha: This isn't darkness my brother. This is a joy. A Black kind of Joy. A Joy only few will ever experience. There is a beauty in pain. There is power in Sacrifice. And there is Greatness in always being alone.
Me: But don’t you miss your family? Don’t you miss your friends? Don’t you miss being in love?
Maha: I have made many mistakes in my past my brother. And I promise I will never make anyone a collateral damage ever again.
Me: I respect your decision but you still haven’t answered my question. Don’t you miss being like everybody else?
Maha: I am alone here. I wake up alone. I sleep alone and I train alone. I see married couples, girlfriends and boyfriends, people who drink and party. I see love and laughter and joy everywhere I go. But you see being alone is what makes me stand out from the crowd. I am stronger when I am alone. I know there is a part of me which still feels … something. But that part is slowly dying away Michael. And very soon there will be nothing in me which will even be remotely human.
Me: Why kill something so beautiful?
Maha: There is a beauty in war. You don’t see War and Battle and Pain as I do. And I guess no one ever has and no one ever will. And that is why I know I will always be misunderstood.
Me: But I can fix this for you. I can give you all that you are willing to sacrifice.
Maha: There is victory only in sacrifice. There is greatness only in being truly alone.
Me: I can never be like you brother. When I first came to you all I had for you was remorse and hate because the Lords had told me that you would be the reason of our demise. That you would be the one who would end the reign of the gods. But the more I spent time with you, I came to saw that there was only Goodness in you and I had no right to take that away from you. I felt in my heart that you deserved to be happy. And that is why I fell in love with your kindness. But then something happened, didn’t it? You came across a Darkness within you. Didn’t you? And you gave in to it. Am I not right?
Maha: It is time for you to go and meet Hades my friend.
Me: Answer me brother. Please tell me what was it that changed you. That is the one thing I could never figure out. Please tell me!
Maha: Somethings and some people are never meant to be understood. I have learnt that the hard way. I can’t answer your question brother. I can’t give an answer to justify what I feel and how Battle and Loneliness some how fill me up. I am sorry my brother but I have no answer for you.
Me: I don’t pray much you know that but I will pray for you my friend. I will pray that one day you find love. That one day you find someone who tames the beast in you. I will pray that one day you will find your House with the Picked Fence. I will pray that one day you do have a normal life.
Maha: This is my life now. And given a choice I will choose this life over and over again ‘cause one day these Sacrifices will reap the rewards I so long for. One day these struggles will have value. One day my battles will prove to be victorious. And until that day comes I will Get Up, Dress Up and Show Up for the fight every single day. I will look at temptation and love and kindness and care right in the eye and so No to all of those feelings. I will stand for what I believe in. I will do what I know is right for me. I will never stop. And I will never give up. You go now brother. And you take care ok.
Me: I love you man.
Maha: :-)
"The true adventurer goes forth aimless and uncalculating to meet and greet unknown fate."
So that was my last conversation with my friend Mahaakshay Chakraborty. I know I am going to be back in the Underworld very soon but something tells me I will meet him again very soon. He truly is a lone wolf and it isn’t easy being Mahaakshay. I really do pray that he finds what he is looking for. But if I ever get to befriend another human being I will surely tell him about Mahaakshay. And I will also tell that other mortal that one should never be like Mahaakshay and when he will ask me why? I will tell him that only the bravest of us all can bear that kind of a burden. And there is no one as brave as Mahaakshay. For All Men Are Dogs. Few Are Wolves. But Only Few Are Lions. And only One Is Mahaakshay Chakraborty.
This is me, Michael, The Reaper and I was once the Friend of Mahaakshay Chakraborty.
With All My Might,
Your No.1 Fan,
Michael.
"To live alone is the fate of all great souls."
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