I was there. When End Game released in the theatres and when that iconic moment happened! Thor and iron man were getting beat by the mad titan Thanos and then suddenly you saw Mjornir rise from the ground and hit Thanos. But then the hammer went into the hands of Captain America and you could hear Thor said, "I knew it!" It was one of the most iconic moments in Movie History! The eruption of the entire cinema hall was an added bonus to the euphoria Steve Rogers caused! At that moment, along with the goosebumps, all I could feel was, WOW! Captain America is so worthy! I mean he is the one human being who picked up the hammer! That got me thinking and thus started my youtube searches for, 'When did steve rogers become worthy?' and so on ... The more I saw videos and read theories of comic book fans, the more I understood that Steve just wasn't worthy, he was also Righteous!
If you google Righteousness, you will see it means, 'Acting in accord with divine or moral law. Free from guilt or sin. Morally right or justifiable. Arising from an outraged sense of justice and morality.
So the question rises ... in our current world, what does it really take to become righteous? And do we even want to be righteous?
We are flawed creatures and I know no one can be perfect. We all have our vices and weaknesses. The good and the bad is within us all and it is ok to error. I know I am not perfect. I know I am flawed and broken but I still have this urge, this hunger to find out who I am. Imagine a quest. A quest which has no end. A journey of self discovery which honestly, doesn't have a destination. Even as I am writing this, I am looking. Looking for something within me to make sense of it all. Maybe that is why I am who I am. Over the course of my life, I have truly begun to love myself for now I am friends with the soul within me. That soul which hungers for salvation and nirvana. That soul which knows I am meant to go where I have never gone before.
So what will it take for me to be righteous? My devotion to my parents? Or the love to the people who matter to me? Or by giving it my very best to make my dreams come true everyday? To be honest, I think in order to be righteous one has to first accept that they aren't right at all. In my life, just like the billions out there, I have made mistakes. But today, I have learnt from my mistakes and more importantly, I have accepted those mistakes and learnt to move on from them. We can lie to the world as much as we want but we can't lie to ourselves. To our souls. We must first accept who we are. Who we truly are in order to become free. I know who I am now. I am a regular joe, just like everyone else with a fire burning in me. A fire to push harder. A fire that burns because I know I still have a lot to learn and to grow. I can't ever stop. I can't stop trying and giving and getting up every time I fall. I just can't. Maybe that is why I show up to Crossfit everyday. Maybe that is why after every WOD, when I am tired and don't have a single ounce of breath left in my body, I want to train again. Maybe that is why everyday I wake up with the same hopes and dreams I had yesterday. Maybe one day, when I have finally given my all, will I be able to come close to being truly righteous.
But what if just giving your blood, sweat and tears isn't enough? What will it take to truly be a noble soul? To have no sin in oneself and to finally kneel before God and tell him/her that I am worthy to be Righteous? I think it is the culmination of everything. The good and the bad. The light and the darkness. The love and the hate. All of it. Without fear, without remorse. To be broken yet stand tall. To fight when all is lost. To hope even when the dark is darkest for only in that darkness are you truly defined. All my life, I have carried guilt and failure on my shoulders. But now, I use that same guilt and failure as my passion. Passion which fuels me to train harder. To give more. To wake up and embrace the pain. To look at the darkness straight in the eye and say, "I am not afraid of you for you make me strong." Today, I am not learning how to bear the storm, today, I am becoming the storm! And I hope by reading this, I can help and motivate at least one person on earth to seek their righteousness. For aren't we trying to be the best versions of ourself? Aren't we trying to do good in this dark world? Aren't we trying to find our way to God?
To love our parents, to share laughter with our friends, to motivate a downed soul, aren't these things to become righteous? Honestly, after all these years, I have understood one thing and that is if I 'try' to become righteous, I will never be righteous if my intention comes out of necessity rather than out of love. Steve Rogers never planned to become Worthy or Righteous. He was just himself and he always did what he thought was the right thing to do, even though it would make a single voice against a majority. He was always himself. Steve Rogers, was always, Steve Rogers. Maybe that is how one day I will become righteous, by me, just being me. By waking up in the morning and having the same hope I had yesterday. By loving the world and choosing kindness over anger. By being kind over showing strength. By just smiling into the empty void and not being afraid. By loving my parents and siblings and to see them smile. By never letting that fire inside of me go out. By looking at defeat and saying to it on its face, "Not Today. Not Today." By never ever giving up. Ever.
Maybe one day, you never know, I might be able to lift Thor's Hammer like Steve Rogers after all. :-)
“And so this mortal went ahead in his journey. A quest to find himself in the hidden parts of his very soul. And when he travelled across the seven oceans and the highest peaks, he realised that he wasn’t destined to be normal but to be The One. Not only because he had the will and might of the gods but because he had the power of belief.”
-The Book Of Prophecies.
In a few hours I will be on my way to the airport. I am going for two and half months to the land of the free and the home of the brave. After 13 years I will finally be going back to Los Angeles. I can’t even begin to tell you how excited I am. But beyond the excitement and the rush of going back there I feel this deep sense of responsibility. Like I have gotten a chance by the mighty universe to get even more better. In these past few months I have done courses in Comedy Improv, Salsa, Hip Hop and gotten the taste of Crossfit. I promised myself that I will emerge myself in my preparation for the great opportunity that very soon is going to come my way. But since it was decided a couple months ago that I was going to the United States I decided that all the training should be put on hold and all the energy and focus should be directed towards Los Angeles. And you know me, I find the true, spiritual meaning in everything that happens to me and lately I have started seeing the positive in every situation and trust me, even though the situation may not change, you surely feel a whole lot better when you see what you can be grateful for even in the midst of normality. Trust me readers, all that happens, happens only for the good and when you have the power of belief, anything is possible.
"Sometimes it's the journey that teaches you a lot about your destination."
-Drake
Do you remember The Dark Knight Rises? Do you remember Bane’s character in it? We all know that he was a Merc for hire but do you remember when Alfred is giving Bane’s introduction to Bruce Wayne? Do you remember what does he say? He says, “Master Wayne, what I see isn’t just a man on a mission, what I see is the Power Of Belief.” Many people have asked me, “What is it that you want to do with your life?” And I simply tell them, I want to be a part of the movies now and forever. And then they ask, “Then why aren’t you doing what others are?” And I reply, I can and without your knowledge I actually do all those things but what I also do, is prepare and keep my focus and make sure that I learn and train and use all my energy on making myself better because I know that one day my time will come and when it does come I will be ready. And this answer isn’t a sense of arrogance but it is my Power Of Belief. A belief so strong that it will one day change the world. A belief with such will and might that one day I will shine as bright as the sun. A belief with such purity and focus that one day I will no longer be in the sidelines but in the spotlight.
"Focus on the journey, not the destination. Joy is found not in finishing an activity but in doing it."
-Greg Anderson
You all know that I went to Phuket last year, twice. And both those times and in fact, also at every new year’s eve I have this custom I follow. I play a few stages on either Medal Of Honour or Ghost Recon Future Soldier and I hear the song Stupify from the rock band Disturbed. Even tonight, I have followed the very same custom. It is like I am reminding myself who I truly am and what responsibilities lay in front of me and what all I need to do in the 2 1/2 months that are now in front of me. It is me showing myself that behind the iron clad skin, my soul will always be on a quest to learn and explore more. That deep down, I will always be grateful to the universe and to my parents and to my family and to my life itself for making me the man that I am today. That every thing that has happened in my life has brought me to this new exciting juncture of my life where I will only evolve. So before I leave, I will put my headphones on and Stupify will be heard by the nerves of my brain for the trillionth time and everything in the universe will look beautiful and the siren of the gods will be heard.
"We are at our very best, and we are happiest, when we are fully engaged in work we enjoy on the journey toward the goal we've established for ourselves. It gives meaning to our time off and comfort to our sleep. It makes everything else in life so wonderful, so worthwhile."
-Earl Nightingale
So what is in stored for me in the city of angels? Well, first it is the UFC 200 expo happening in las vegas which I really really wanna go for ‘cause I will get the opportunity to see and meet the amazing ufc fighters and also take pictures with them! it will truly be a dream come true for me! And it is on the 8th so I can tell the jet lag to take a hike ‘cause I will be going to vegas! And then it is the grand UFC Gyms which are located all over LA for me to choose from and be a part of. I have waited nearly 6 years to train in a UFC Gym and very soon that dream of mine will come true! Then it is the endless places and spots where comedy improv and stand-up comedy workshops are taking place for me to choose from. Since I have done till Level 2 here it would be great to see what level 3 has in stored for me over there. I also goggled Parkour and Crossfit gyms which I can join and I will also be enrolling myself at the IDA Hollywood Centre. The International Dance Academy in Hollywood. It is one of the most renowned and popular and recognised dance centres in Los Angeles and when you see their students perform their hip-hop moves on youtube you will agree with me that it will truly be an honour to be a part of their centre. And of course when I will be done with kicking a 1,000 kicks at the UFC gym and sweating it at and learning new dance moves at IDA and trying to come up with spontaneous jokes at the comedy stand-up studio, I will be touring the Universal City Walk, watching all the latest films, and taking a gazillion pics and keep snap chatting as much as I can. So it looks like I have a very busy 2.1/2 months in front of me. And even though it took 13 years for me to go back, I can tell you right now, every moment of that wait was worth it.
"Every day is a journey, and the journey itself is home."
-Matsuo Basho
So once again I embark on a new chapter of my life. I embark on a task to make myself better and make my parents proud and prove to myself without a shadow of a doubt that I have the will and determination to go beyond the call of duty. To be the best version of myself and to push harder when I can’t anymore. I thank you all for being my readers. I thank my family for this opportunity and I thank the universe for giving this feeling of bliss. I can’t promise if I will blog from there but if I do I will share all my bliss and joy with you as well. You see, the universe is a friendly place and I am a firm believer in the power of it. I know I am connected to it. And I know it is with me every step of the way. You can harness it’s power also. You can also find your joy and bliss. Never doubt it. Never give in to the negativity that you feel may cloud over you sometimes. Find the greater good. Seek the happiness and it will cone to you. Rumi said a very wonderful thing once. He said, “What You Seek Is Also Seeking You.” Ask yourself the question. Go on that quest and your joy will come to you. So before I go all I can say is that I have beautiful road ahead of me, which is filled with excitement and joy and learning and bliss. And everyday I will the grateful for the blessings the universe showers over me. I hope you do that also.
This is Me, Mahaakshay Chakraborty and this is My Story.
“So finally, after all the trials and the errors of his human heart, the mortal we chose will realise his power. He will know what he is destined for. And it won’t be the normality that life will offer. It won’t be the Barbeque grill or the beers or the laughs. It will be the quest to find himself. The journey of the soul. The path of the lone wolf. And when he does embrace this journey of his, he will be changed forever. He will become unique. He will become One Of Us.”
-The Book Of Prophecies.
The Last Of Us …
I feel so proud to be one of the billions who had the chance to play such an amazing game! I have always been a gamer but now, after playing The Last Of Us I can proudly say that I am The Gamer! The Last Of Us is by far one of the best games I have ever played! Every moment was engrossing and thrilling! I was so addicted to the game and even though I wanted to finish the game at the same time I never wanted the game to end! Whether it was the amazing upgrades you get for your weapons or the beautiful scenery the developers designed or whether it was the realistic fight sequences, the game was truly epic! I really wish they make a sequel of the game! Yes, I want the characters to return. I want more upgrades and I want to feel that excitement to play the game again! But if there ever comes a time when I do survive an apocalypse I know I would make the same choices and fight as hard to survive as the characters in the game did. There is something amazing about living in a world like that. A world where 24/7 your survival instincts are on. I guess for a War Junkie like me it would feel just like home. But for now, I am just as happy playing the amazing game with a remote in my hands. :-)
"Consciously or not, we are all on a quest for answers, trying to learn the lessons of life. We grapple with fear and guilt. We search for meaning, love, and power. We try to understand fear, loss, and time. We seek to discover who we are and how we can become truly happy."
Do you know there is a show called Lucifer premiering next year? I did see the Trailer and as soon as I did I was rushed with excitement! I mean how cool is that! Not only did Supernatural show how amazing Lucifer was but now they have a show solely dedicated to the Bad-Ass of all angels! I can’t wait for it to start! Trust me, when you watch the trailer you will agree with me. I mean he is Lucifer, the most mis-understood angel of all but now he is fed up from hell and has taken a break and come to earth and al though he carries all the 9 circles of sins with him, he is still here on earth helping humans in his own devilish way! Yes, I do see myself in him. I always thought I was mis-understood and maybe that is why I feel the connection with him and watching all those episodes and see Lucifer Kick-Ass would be a pure delight! Lucifer … please start soon! :-)
"If those committed to the quest fail, they will be forgiven. When lost, they will find another way. The moral imperative of humanism is the endeavor alone, whether successful or not, provided the effort is honorable and failure memorable."
I was always in love with The Office which starred Ricky Gervais and I till today I wish that it had more than 2 seasons. But now, recently I have started watching the American Version of The Office starring Steve Carrell and I must say that I am hooked! I am right now in the 3rd season and I am happy to know that is has 9 seasons in total! Every night I laugh my ass off before I shut my eyes and venture off into dreamland. The actors are par excellence and their comic timing is to die for! This show is a must for all ‘cause I do know that we all deserve a laugh now and then. :-)
"Man is wise and constantly in quest of more wisdom; but the ultimate wisdom, which deals with beginnings, remains locked in a seed. There it lies, the simplest fact of the universe and at the same time the one which calls forth faith rather than reason."
Whoever created the Dubsmash app, I salute you! It was a genius move and today the app is a worldwide phenomena! Each and everyone has recorded and tried something or the other while using the app and when I caught the bug of the Dubsmash App I knew that I would for a very long time be addicted to it. And now, Me, My brothers and their friends are somewhat celebrities on the App! Whether it is the comments we get on our instagram page or whether it is people coming up to us and actually telling us that we make funny dubsmash videos is truly a very good feeling! I am completely in love with the app and if given a choice I would love to make a Dubsmash video everyday. Funny or serious. Dialogue or song, dubsmash is the app for all! :-)
"Clarity and consistency are not enough: the quest for truth requires humility and effort."
Disturbed has been my favourite Rock band for ages now! I think I have heard their song ’Stupify’ at least a million times and their other song ‘Indestructible’ a close second! Their music completes me. And there can’t be any better band for me than Disturbed. And now, they have come up with their Brand New Album titled Immortalized. It is available on iTunes right now and if you are a rock lover then this album is for you. You should hear ‘The Vengeful One’, ‘The Light’ and ‘The Sound Of Silence’. Oh yeah, they are my top three songs from the album. The Vengeful One tops my list ‘cause if you listen to the lyrics, you will agree with me also. The lyrics have power and meaning and a message only a band as beautiful as Disturbed can. And The Vengeful one relates a lot with The Punisher so my connection with the song is deeper than just guitars and drums. This album is a must-hear for all rockers! Download now! :-)
"The eternal quest of the individual human being is to shatter his loneliness."
I know I know, this is a complete opposite of Rock Music but for as long as I can’t remember but I have always loved Country music. Maybe it is the two opposites sides of the spectrum thing that ticks me the right way. I mean on one side I have this amazing rock band expressing their feelings with an electronic guitar and on the other side I hear these talented musicians talking about their first crush and beer in a smooth melody. I still don’t know why I love Country music so much. Maybe it is the fascination that one day I will go to America and wear a Cowboy hat and take part in the small town festivals and eat Chicken Wings and have Beer. Or maybe the music just touches the right chords in me. To be honest, I don’t know yet but what I do know that if after Rock there is any other Music Genre which I really love, then it is Country Music. :-)
"The longest journey is the journey inwards. Of him who has chosen his destiny, Who has started upon his quest for the source of his being."
I have been training with Abbas Ali since February. And now, after 6 months of training with him, I can say it was one of the best decisions I have ever made! He is truly one of the best trainers out there and now we share a bond of family and brotherhood than of a coach and a client. I look up to him and always listen to his advice. In fact, the entire Bodyholics team is like Family for me. Whether it is the-always-ripped Mayank or the Serious-Yet-Funny guy Nadir or the Woman who keeps the Bodyholics foundation strong-Vedu, the bodyholics team is a part of my daily life. So you can imagine how happy and excited I am that Coach is now coming up with his own Combine Training Studio! Oh ya, you heard me, the very first Combine Training Studio! People have already started enrolling into it and everyone is also talking about it. Any gym and every gym has heard the news that by September 3rd week or so the Studio will be open for it’s members and the talks are that it is truly state-of-the-art! Well, I have already seen the place. Coach has given the complete layout and trust me, I am not over-exaggerating but truly and with all seriousness the Bodyholics Combine Training Studio is next-level and whoever wants to be the part of the elite should join right away! I know I already have. :-)
"The quest for certainty blocks the search for meaning. Uncertainty is the very condition to impel man to unfold his powers."
Dream. Come. True!!! I am speechless! I am so excited and I am so happy! I am actually going to the Fight Camp! I am over-joyed and whenever I think about how amazing it will be there my face just lights up! I will be there for a month and I will get a chance to take my training to the next level! I really should thank my parents for giving me this opportunity and letting me live my dream! You must have known by now that I have always loved Fighting and Testing my limits both mentally and physically! And now, I have that opportunity! I will be Training, Eating and Staying inside the Camp and will be training for nearly 5-6 hours a day! I can just keep on talking about this amazing adventure of the human spirit I am about to start in just a few days but what I am thinking is that I will try to update the world with my blogs everyday when I am there. I do agree that the blogs maybe one or two paragraphs long but I believe that, that way you will see the experience I am having there on a daily basis. Whether it is Muay Thai or Mma or even Brazilian Jui-Jitsu, they have everything at camp! They train early in the mornings even in the late evenings. They have beach workouts and also Cross-Fit and even the Toughest Boot Camp Training in Asia! Can you imagine GSP {George St. Pierre} has also trained at Tiger Mma! You can sense my excitement right now, can’t you? So imagine how I will be when I will be in the camp! :-) As I said earlier, I really thank my parents for giving me this opportunity and believing in me and also thanks to my siblings for supporting me in this venture. And I should also deeply thank the universe for this! This has been one of greatest dreams I ever had and in a span of just a few days it will be true! Yes, I am going there to push my limits. Yes, I am going there to transform. But more importantly I am going there to find myself. Yes, in the midst of Training and Blood, Sweat and Tears and all the Muscle Soreness I know I will find the thing that I am looking for. That answer to my question. That path which is laid infant of me. That Greatness which only a Lone Wolf can have.
"Join me in my quest for a greater understanding of our existence. Join me in my desire for a greater self. Join me as I seek the humility to love and understand my fellow man."
So there you have it. The Little BIG Chapters of my life. I guess it is small things which lead up to the big things. Every chapter written here has impacted me in a spiritual level and every thing that I have written here is a part of me. A very dear part of me. I thank you all once again for reading my blogs and spreading the word. As mentioned earlier, I will try my best to be in touch when I go to camp. Maybe I will write a Blog everyday or maybe I won’t write at all. Maybe I will post videos and tweet about the entire amazing adventure or maybe i will just change and become The Warrior who stays in the shadows. Life is amazing. We just need to see the miracles that happen to us everyday. We need to have the courage to step out and beyond our comfort zone and go looking for that what defines us. I know I am doing it right now. I wish you do it also. We all are blessed in some way or the other. And we all should should be Grateful about it, one way or another. :-)
"I feel the older I get, the more I'm learning to handle life. Being on this quest for a long time, it's all about finding yourself."
