Sunday, 22 February 2015

Putting The 'H' In Zero ...

"In the end, it all comes down to the choice that you make. There, at the very bottom of the pit, in the depth of darkness, you are left with only two choices. Either to stay there, lost, beaten and destroyed. Or to rise like the Burning Phoenix."

-Mahaakshay Chakraborty.

So where do I begin? Do I tell you how I got here? Or should I start from where it all began? I honestly don’t know ‘cause I don’t know whether I have the power to motivate you or scare you. I don’t know whether my words will ever be understood by you. And I don’t know if my thoughts will ever make sense. But what I do know is that everybody fights. We all are fighting a never-ending war. The war to win. The war to make our dreams come true. The war to fit into society. And the War to just matter. So why would you want to read this blog? I have been labelled as a Star Kid, a Baboon and a Washed-Up Nobody who thinks he still has a chance. Why would you want to read these lines anyways? I will tell you why. ‘Cause underneath that thick exterior of yours, you know that I am just like you. You know that you and me are not so different. That in the end you and I have the same goal … To Survive. 

"Desire is the key to motivation, but it's determination and commitment to an unrelenting pursuit of your goal - a commitment to excellence - that will enable you to attain the success you seek."

I just turned 30 a few months ago. I remember an episode of Friends in which Jennifer Aniston’s character aka Rachel turns 30 and when she does realise it, in the birthday party thrown by her friends, she actually gets depressed that she has gotten old. That scene has been fixated in my brain since the very first time I saw it and I somehow started to believe that I would feel that exact same way. But when I did turn 30 and when I was surrounded by my friends and family and the people who loved me, I actually kinda liked it. And not only because I was surrounded in happiness but also because I realised that after all the mishaps and the wrongs and the failures I am still here. Did you read that? I said I am Still Here! So what does that make me? Well, it makes me just like you. it makes me a Survivor. A man who has seen defeat. A man who has been laughed at. And a man who wasn’t given a fair chance. But a Man who just never learned to give up. I am just like you. And you are just like me. You just don’t know it yet. :-)

"Ability is what you're capable of doing. Motivation determines what you do. Attitude determines how well you do it."

Hollywood, Bollywood, Tollywood, Kollywood and whichever other ‘Woods’ there are out there, I know what they offer. I know how they lure us. I know what magic they possess. ‘Cause I have seen it. I saw it since the 1st day I was born. Both of my parents are from the Film Industry and the Surname I possess requires me to never introduce myself. I am the 1st in line among 4 and it rests upon me to carry on the torch what my Mother and Father have so proudly withheld for so long. As a son, it is my life-long dream to make them feel proud of me and I want to give my family all the happiness in the world. And even though I have faltered in more ways than one to make my dreams come true, in the core, I always knew that My intentions were true. That they mattered and even today, my dreams are still the very same they were when I first felt goosebumps. But what does a man do when he gets beaten up, every single time? What does he do when he still has to wait for a Fair Opportunity? Does he quit? Does he run? Or does he Fight back. I think me writing this blog gives you the answer that I chose to Fight back rather than quit or run. 

"Wanting something is not enough. You must hunger for it. Your motivation must be absolutely compelling in order to overcome the obstacles that will invariably come your way."

But this blog ins’t about me to be honest. It isn’t either a shallow attempt to gain your sympathy or earn your respect. This blog is about YOU. Yes. It is about you. ‘Cause when I see in the mirror and when that reflection looks back at me, I only hear these words, “Fight back! Fight Back! Fight Back!” And that is what I have been doing since the last 9 years! Fighting back. Every time I was laughed at I fought back. Every time I was spat at, I fought back and every time I was forgotten I fought back. Just like you have. Believe me, no matter how hard it may be for you right now to believe this, you coming this far after all the challenges that you have faced proves only one thing and that is that you are a Certified Bad-Ass! That’s right you heard me say it! A Certified Bad-Ass! You are human just like me but you have a Soul Of Iron. You may cry just like me but you have the Will of the Gods and you may feel defeat just like me but you have the drive of a Hero. So my friends, no matter people may call you. Whether it is a loser, an ass, or a never-will-be, remember, only YOU have the power to remove the ‘Z’ from the Zero and put a ‘H’ in the Hero. 

"I'll always use the negativity as more motivation to work even harder and become even stronger."

Nobody got it easy. Nobody ever will. All you have to do is get back up again. And trust me when your times comes, which I know it will, you will be ready for it. All soldiers are trained for battle but only the chosen few, Embrace it. I want YOU to embrace this. Embrace who you are. Embrace the struggle, embrace the rejections, embrace the chances lost. Embrace everything. And then use that power. Use that power to see who you truly are. We all have Goodness in us. But evil has it’s ways of making us believe that we aren’t worthy. But I tell you, evil is wrong ‘cause I have looked evil in the eye and I have won. I came back a better man, a stronger man and an honest man. It takes balls to stand by the truth. It takes balls to stick to your ideals and it takes some serious balls to sacrifice all that is in front of you to achieve all that you have dreamed off. So stick to it. Don’t quit ‘cause as Rocky said, “Nothing Beats You Harder Than Life”! But we have to keep fighting! We have to keep on believing that WE matter and together you and I can make our dreams come true. I remember during JIMMY I was reckless and I didn’t take care of Myself and for that I paid the price and for the next 2 years I was at home doing nothing. And then I got a chance to redeem myself with HAUNTED. But when Haunted clicked my Ego came into play and I became an Ass and for that I was again Punished. Then came ENEMMY in which I had put my hopes and dreams and I was convinced that after Enemmy there was no going back for me. But then again, destiny knew I wasn’t ready and yet again left me unemployed for 2 years. Now, finally I have this chance again in ISHQEDARRIYAAN. A movie I got completely out of the blue and straight out of luck. But I never considered myself to be lucky. I considered myself to be ready. And do you know why? After the failure of Enemmy I promised myself that I would never let one day go to waste. So I cried and I wept for days and then I wiped my tears away. I got up, looked myself in the mirror and said, “Let’s get to work!” 

"When you look at people who are successful, you will find that they aren't the people who are motivated, but have consistency in their motivation."

And that was 2 years ago. Since that day, I have made myself use to a plan. A plan of Giving and Investing time on myself. I scheduled myself with the hours of the day and broke my day down into segments. Whether it is my 30mins walks, my Mixed Martial Arts Training or My Diction and Voice Practice, I made time for them all. And now, when Ishqedarriyaan is only a few months away from release, I am upgrading my game plan. I have just started training with one of the best personal trainers Bollywood has to offer, {I am keeping that a secret until the time comes} I am making my own food, whether it is my Protein Shakes or my fruit smoothies or my grilled chicken breasts. I am also doing two Online Courses, one in Creative Writing from Gotham Writers and one in Astro-Biology from Coursera which is from the University of Arizona. I also have challenged myself to read 12 books in a year, {I know that’s less but it’s my 1st attempt} and I am already in my 4th book. I am investing more and more time in myself. And I know that investing time on myself means that I won’t be able to give time to others. But a promise is a promise and I standing by it. I hope, that slowly slowly, all the people I know understand that my dreams are more important to me than moments spent with them. And in time, they come to respect that. So today I stand at the crossroads Of Time waiting for an answer from Destiny. But until Destiny gives me my answer, I will give and I will sacrifice and I will push and I will never give up. And everyday I will remind myself that I will always have many idols who I will look up to but I will be My Own Hero.

"There's always the motivation of wanting to win. Everybody has that. But a champion needs, in his attitude, a motivation above and beyond winning."

So before I go all I wanna say is thank you! Yes. Thank you. Thank you for being there for me. Thank you for always being there. You may think why I am thanking you and how we are connected. Well, we have one common link and that link will always bind us together. Our WILL. Yes. Our will to always fight back. Our will to never give up. Our will to look at Destiny in the eyes and tell her that we aren’t going anywhere. That no matter how much destiny tests us, we will triumph. We will not go silent in the night. We will not pack our bags and go home and face defeat. We will grind, we will crawl, we will scratch our way but we will at the end of the day see the light! So dear readers, always remember that we matter. Our dreams matter. Our ideals matter. Our sacrifices matter. And yes, we all destined for greatness and yes, our time will come. Have faith in yourself. Have faith in the path that you have chosen to walk on. Have faith in your dreams and never stop. I know the road to success ins’t easy. it is filled with hardships and trials. But gather all your will. Gather all your strength and get back up! You heard me, Get Up! ‘Cause every Hero was once a Zero. But that Zero refused to ever give up. :-)

"I think it all comes down to motivation. If you really want to do something, you will work hard for it."

This is Me, Mahaakshay Chakraborty. And I am Putting My ‘H’ In Zero.

With All My Might,

Your No.1 Fan,

Mahaakshay Chakraborty.