We all need help. In some form or another. Someone needs financial help. Or emotional help and sometimes it’s just help to carry the groceries. We are humans not super heroes. We all need our saving. I was and I still am one of them. One of the many who needs saving and for a very long time, I had convinced myself that I don’t need it. Call it ego or pride or just a fake male bravado, I kept telling myself for years that I am ok and strong enough to deal with the problems and challenges the world throws at me. But I was wrong and I am so glad I was.
I believe in fate. I believe we all come with a destiny and when you trust the process, you come to understand that everything happens at the right time, at the right place and for the right reasons. Therapy is in my life because I do believe it is for the greater good and for a purpose which is beyond my comprehension. Of course, I won’t be able to tell you what I discuss with my therapist but I can of course tell you how much therapy has unraveled me in front of my own eyes. I understand myself more better now and therapy works because you are shedding your mask and being absolutely vulnerable and truthful to a stranger who’s only job is to make you better. There are no judgements nor any comparisons nor disappointments. There are only solutions to problems which we create in our own minds.
I used to keep asking myself, why am I so stuck up on things. Why am I so rigid and such a pain in the ass. Through therapy I realized that it was because I was afraid of change. Afraid to step into the unknown and feel lost. Through each session of talking and debating and understanding, it has come to my attention that the only person blocking me from me being who I truly am, is ME. My own thoughts which I have knotted tight in my brain. It’s not my emotions which are the problem, it’s the thoughts which control them. When people ask me to sum up how good therapy is, I just tell them it’s me, unknotting those constant negative thoughts in my brain, one thread at a time. One session at a time. :)
I am not here publicizing therapy nor am it’s brand ambassador. If I wanted to promote my therapist, I would had told you who that person was and would had even given the person’s contact details here. But this blog isn’t about that. This blog is an attempt to show you that it’s ok to ask for help and to seek help and that there is nothing wrong to be weak. In fact, I believe that when a person admits that he/she needs help, it is actually, a sign of great strength and courage. I know that society considers therapy a taboo but therapy just doesn’t imply that you need to talk to a certified expert. Therapy means that you talk. Just talk it out. Vent out and feel lighter and better. Keeping things inside and trying to deal with your problems on your own doesn’t do you any good. Trust me, I know. Talk to people whom you can trust. Speak your heart and be yourself and I promise you that you will feel better. No matter how alone you feel, I do believe that the almighty has given us at least one person with whom we can shed our skin and be real with. I really hope you have that person in your life right now as you read this.
Whether it was my last blog about captain America or the blog previous to it about CrossFit, I know all these blogs are a part of who I am and even writing this blog right now is therapy for me. I am in a way, venting, letting out my emotions and feeling better about myself. :) I have also understood that I am fine the way I am. Whether I am bruised, battered or even broken, underneath all the struggle and the pain and the insecurities and tears, I am still a Pure Bad Ass, just like all of you, for we all fight. The only sadness is that we don’t seem to care about it. But therapy reminds me everyday that I need to be me. Therapy reminds me to care because I like caring. Caring about the people I love and lifting people who have fallen for I was also once fallen. I like motivating people because I know how it feels like to be ridiculed and to be told that I am worthless. I like bringing people together because I am tired of seeing people putting lines in the sand for their religions and their gods and their lands. I want to see this world to be a better place because I do believe in hope and miracles and the divine intervention of the cosmic energy. I want to be the best version of myself even if the world doesn’t see it. I want to be me because simply, it’s just very therapeutic for me. :)
So here I am telling you once again that it’s ok to be weak and vulnerable for only when you admit that you need help can you actually learn to be free. Only when you accept that life broke you can you learn to build yourself up again. Only when you let go of all that anger and resentment can you actually forgive yourself. Only when you learn from the past can you embrace your future. You just have to learn to not be so hard on yourself. It’s ok to screw up. To have a mis step and fall. What matters is how many times you get back again. We are human beings. We are capable of horrible wars we have waged on each other and we are also capable of hugging our enemy and making him our friend. I tell you, it’s ok to be you because you are amazing just the way you are. :)
So this is me and this is my story and yes, I do need help. I found that help and I really hope you find yours as well.
Thanking you from the bottom of my heart,
Cause I’m just another random blogger trying to make a difference.
With all respects,
Mahaakshay Chakraborty.
